Are you divorcing your partner? Are you worried about how your children are going to handle it?
No matter how amicable the situation is, divorce is always hard on a child. Luckily, there are things you can do to make the divorce process easier for your children. What do you need to do?
Check out this guide to discover the top tips for helping children with divorce.
1. Break the News the Right Way
If you wait for the perfect time to tell your kids about your divorce, it’ll be too late. The truth is, there is never going to be a perfect time.
Ideally, you want to talk to your kids about the divorce shortly after you’ve officially made your decision. If possible, try to have both parents present for the conversation.
When talking to your children about your decision, it’s important that you leave out feelings of anger and resentment toward your partner. This conversation should center around your child and how they’re feeling.
The most important thing you want to get across in this conversation is that you love and your ex both love your children, and the divorce won’t change that. You also want to assure your children that while things will be different, divorce doesn’t mean that they’re losing a parent.
2. Don’t Put Your Kids in the Middle
No matter how nasty things get between you and your ex, you never want to put your child in the middle of your arguments. Your child should NOT:
- Be the go-between for you and your ex
- Be a source for you to vent to
- See the messiness of the divorce process
Your goal should be to make the divorce as harmonious and seamless as possible for your child. Never talk bad about your ex in front of your child, no matter how tempting it may be.
3. Hire a Divorce Lawyer
While it may sound counterintuitive, hiring a divorce lawyer can actually be in the best interest of your child.
With the help of a divorce lawyer, settling the legal matters of your divorce will be a lot easier. For example, a divorce lawyer can walk you and your partner through what the options are when it comes to deciding child custody. They can also help you figure out the division of your property and assets in a way that best benefits your child.
4. Encourage Honesty
While the messy details of your divorce don’t need to be shared with your child, you should still encourage an open and honest environment. Don’t let that initial conversation be the only time you talk about the divorce with your child.
Instead, make sure you continuously check in with them to see how they’re feeling. Also, remember to legitimize their feelings. Whether they’re feeling sad, angry, or hurt, don’t brush it off. Instead, let them know that you understand their feelings and that they’re free to express them.
Helping Children With Divorce: Time to Get Started
Now that you’ve read this guide on helping children with divorce, it’s time to put these tips into action. With these tips, the divorce process should be a lot easier for your child.
Be sure to check back in with our blog for more parenting tips and tricks.